Since becoming a mumme I have found myself thinking about my own mortality more than I have ever contemplated it before. I guess it’s because I now have 2 little ones I am responsible for. They have opened my heart so wide that I feel more vulnerable and fearful at times when I think about not being around for them. I wish I could be with them forever but I know that in my mortal human body on mother earth, as I know it right now, this is not a possibility. That at some point I will have to say goodbye. It may be goodbye from the life form as I know it now, but I do believe we will meet again in another lifetime. My children and I share a strong spiritual connection and I feel we are and will always be immortally connected together forever. However, the thought of leaving them still hits me right in the heart and tears me apart. It is not something I want to think about but it does cross my mind.
I know it may seem morbid and totally crazy to think about this but over time I have realized it can give me strength, focus and be a reminder of what’s most important in my life and how precious life can be. Knowing this makes me very conscious and aware of how precious my time on mother earth is with my little cherubs. I want to make every moment with them a conscious one. To know that I have given them all of me and to know that I have consciously chosen how I want to show up as a mumme, (most of the time!) through the good times and the challenging times. I want them to know and feel how loved and wanted they are, for they will live on way beyond me in this lifetime.
You see my dad passed away this week and it certainly makes me reflect about the cycle of life. He lived a long life, 82 years and was strong until his final breath. My entire family managed to be with him as his spirit slowly left this world. He lived a beautiful life, followed his heart and loved deeply. He will be missed by many but never forgotten. He holds an extra special place in my heart.
Thankfully my children were blessed to meet him on several occasions, though they are young, they certainly admire and love their POP POP deeply. Jakob and Kira speak of him often. Jakob would often say “I miss Pop Pop” which always warms my heart. And Last time we visited him I asked Kira what was her favorite part of our holiday and she said “visiting Pop Pop”. When I got home this week from QLD Jakob asked if Pop Pop has passed. I answered yes. Later on that night we said a prayer for Pop Pop at bedtime. Jakob said he wanted to put Pop Pop in a bubble…a ‘better’ bubble so that he could get better and come back to us. This touched my heart deeply. So young and so wise. My dad certainly touched their hearts and has imprinted them forever with his love. He is still alive in their hearts (and he will watch over them) and we will continue to speak of him and our other loved ones that have passed too.
So I am writing today to share and reflect and be a reminder of how precious and uncertain life really is. To shine a spotlight on what is most important in life…. the ones we love… that which we cannot measure, nor put a price on.
Life can get crazy and chaotic…we can sweat the small stuff and get off track at times, taken away from what is most important to us. Life can be so busy that we don’t make time to connect with the ones we love or tell them we are thinking of them and how important they are to us. We can hang onto past ‘stuff’, which can get in the way sometimes, or we can forget to share with others of how grateful we are that they are in our lives.
So over this Easter long weekend, you may get some much needed time out from your regular routine to share it with your family and friends. To hold your little ones close, to tell them how much they are loved. To reconnect with someone you haven’t spoken to for a while. To be able to create special moments and memories that will stay with you forever. Whatever it may be, aim to make a conscious effort to show the ones you love how important they are to you both near and far.
I may not know how long I have here on this planet BUT I do know I want my children, my family and friends to know how special they are, how much they mean to me and how much I love them.
So…maybe its time, right now, to reach out, connect, be vulnerable, be courageous, be fearless and show someone how much you love them! Don’t let time pass and don’t leave it too late and wish you had called, visited or reached out to the ones you love. There is no better time than NOW…
Have a beautiful Easter Weekend everyone!
love n life
Nina x
