Nourish. Grow. Nurture. Thrive.
Before becoming a mumme I thought I knew what I was in for…sleepless nights, a crying baby, dirty nappies…but boy I quickly realised nothing could have prepared me for the onrush of mummedom!
Your world instantly changes in one split second. The unconditional love you feel when you meet your little miracle for the first time is unexplainable. It is the most amazing and terrifying experience all rolled into one. This bundle of joy has chosen YOU and you are thrown straight in the deep end without a manual. But, you are armed with the most profound love you have ever felt in your life.
You are bombarded with information right from the get go and you can feel overwhelmed by the rules that seem to come with the territory. Everyone has an opinion and it can send you into a state of confusion and make you doubt your very own intuition and the fact that YOU know what is best for your baby.
The list is endless…breast vs bottle, oversupply vs under supply, the self settling rules, the controlled crying debate, to dummy or not to dummy. All of this can leave you feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, guilty (when you can’t meet up to your expectations or to the current trends), and send you into a state of confusion and an emotional mess. It is not surprising that in the distance of all this confusion you are feeling lost and unsure of what to do and what not to do.
Looking back this was me. I was very overwhelmed when my first little miracle arrived. I had to learn many new skills fast and not to mention navigate my way around a whole lot of new baby contraptions and equipment that sent my head into a spin, amidst the roller coaster of emotions I was feeling.
I struggled with my little one as he struggled to sleep and would constantly wake every 30mins. I would support him by…patting, shoosh’ing, to the point where my arms were numb and my fingers tingly. Once his heavy eye lids would fall I would creep out, crawling slowly on the floor so he would not see me or hear a murmur.
But he knew…and would scream straight away at the top of his lungs and here I was, back to square one, wondering if I would get through it, get my baby to sleep and would I ever sleep again!
After a while I realised that I had to embrace the moment and accept how it was, roll with it instead of fighting against the current and feeling disappointed. I had to let go in order to gain control. To free myself from the overwhelm, read my baby’s cues and follow my gut instinct as to what was best for my little one. I couldn’t squeeze my son into any rigid routine or hope that he would follow the baby books. I drove myself crazy when I couldn’t match up to what the other bubs were doing and it only made me feel more like a failure as a parent and made me question was my son normal and what was going on…what was wrong? Why did I struggle when so many other mums seemed to have it easy?
The truth was everything was OK,…many other mums out there were struggling too. Once I shared my feelings, expressed my frustrations, my overwhelm, my sadness, I quickly realised I was not alone. The mumme journey exposes you to so many amazing highs but low times too. As with most aspects of life, we experience waves of emotion and by letting them let flow without attachment or judgement we can get through any challenging time.
There is really nothing else that compares to being a parent…a mumme. There is no way I really got it until I experienced this joy and the unbelievable sense of responsibility, the worry and the array of emotions that go along with being a parent. Yes nothing quite compares to it and I now look at it in a different light.
There is an unspoken connection….when you see another mumme pushing a stroller or struggling at the shops with a toddler that is having a tantrum, you feel a connection. You glance at each other and there is a sense of knowing, knowing exactly what it feels like as you too have been there before.
We all have our struggles and if we can share our journey with other mumme’s, lend a helping hand, an ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on, we can reconnect and realise we are all the same within. We all want what is best for our children and it is our journey that matters in the end.
So, as I move forward I aim to keep my feet firmly planted in the ground. Strong and ready to brave any storm that may head my way. Knowing that soon it too shall pass like the change of seasons. These precious moments with our children go way to fast! I wish to embrace the mundane with a new sense insight and laugh at the craziness that goes on in my everyday. Life is way too short to stress the small stuff!
Please share your mumme stories where you have overcome adversity and kicked some serious mumme butt!
love n life
Nina x
